butterfly

if i want to be positive, i know i can.. this is the only way to live it.. the way to live it fully.. the way to stop all frm getting too much.. too afar.. if only i can live it simply, then ter wud be less problems.. yet nature abides me frm tat.. i just have to be granted a challenging life.. all i need to do is just to live it positive.

many things have probably changed in just a few days ago.. particularly things related to the mind.. decisions and tat internal state. tat probably make me stronger than i used to. still i do believe the ups and downs syndrome tat most ppl have. yet, i still believe what makes some or most go on is the thought of gracefulness in the end..

the harmony of time spent together with a great family after the long away uni years.. dreams- depicting ur hard-earned career, the occasional holiday trips, ur money!, ur dream house, ur rapport-built frens and society and what more.. ur wife. :) yet, all these wouldn't come just like this.. it takes something to achieve all these..

yes.. and i thought i'd categorise.. tat's one of the mind changest.. i just felt so damn shit of one thing.. i was thinking of improving fellowship with a fren.. ok i'll just expose.. sharon. and this thing came.. early in the morning at 7am, she'd just bitch around with unpleasant newses.. is the spelling even rite? never wud i wanna try another doomshit initiative if she continues with this kind of attitude.. let's call our meeting off..

fuff.. i'd never been this stern.. i just wanna see the good things now.. kill the rotten things.. i'd been the thru the worst scenarios i've ever known.. i just want goodness now.. if u wack, i'll wack harder.. tat's all i wanna media..

ok cont on with the topic.. smehow i just felt this 'butterfly in the stomach' feeling first time in two years.. i know this intense feeling.. reason.. it's frenship built.. it's very different frm other vague feelings.. u just want goodness w/o spoilage.. i know what's love now.. on the other hand, i know too abt nothingness.. more or less, all these are things tat are not to meddle with at this age now..

i just want to live simply.. just conc on career and just an exulting life.. i want more fun than i can ever imagine.. quote someone.. can't mention the name after she'll paiseh.. ok stop here.. see ya.. long gone..